Why still pining over your ugly ex?

Dilemma.
Inner conflict.
Im talking about us, independent yet insecure girls.
1.The break-up was painful and I planned for a rebound
2.yet Im still single after the break-up and he
's as happy as ever
3.but anyway Im alright and in fact we can still be friends
4.but these people are making me feel like Im still clinging onto him
5.which I am NOT (for the 100000 times!)
6.but to NOT being friends will make it more obvious that I still couldnt get over it
7.BUT I already did!


so many BUTs...

Mama said not to misjudge people's thought just the way you dont want them to misjudge yours. Deep down when it comes to my family, friends and former lovers, I cant help it before.
I used to feel that way, always feel the need to tell them "I have gotten over him!!"
But it wont work, in fact it will only confirm their hypothesis of your state of heart and mental.
PATHETIC.

People always say friendship often ends with love but love in friendship - never.
Allow me to depart from the advice..for me being friends with them shows that I bear no grudges and feelings anymore. The more I face the person who broke or has his broken, the more neutral I feel towards them. And to convince you who is deeply broken , there's nothing greater than to look straight into his eyes blankly, as if you were never affected from the start.

Arent you ashamed with the past you had? Its hard to face him!
Of course. I used to throw my pride away for LOVE until it bordered into an obsession, zaman jahiliyah ye..
I was high on pharma drugs and embarrassed him in front of his friends,
I kept in touch with his parents even when its over,
I cried and told him I didnt sleep for 2 days because of him,
I was high again and told his bestie I missed him,
I gave out my diaries for keepsake,
I smoked to near death knowing my lung is weak since birth,
I stalked his girlfriend who is a senior in my university,
I went out with his cousin.

after I bid goodbye to M-boys and switched to girls,younger boys and non-M, I havent experience any of the above anymore. Change is good to get rid of the habit but the key is to feel good and be accountable of your past. In my case, no matter how I wish not to remember any of it anymore, I still think what I did isnt wrong. Foolish on my part, but I let them go. Perhaps you have given out your bra or naked pic so he would realize his loss, you're an idiot but its alright, dont repeat. Meet him and let him know indirectly that it didnt affect you at all.
So I did give you my naked pic before, not a big d
eal coz I have increased a size since the last time. Still, your loss.
Im just saying hehe...

I googled on piccies and found this-

credits as stated.


Be friends with your ex isnt that bad because a familiar company is all you need in the end..
You just have to know when to stop from falling in the trap la kot..Oh, create yours if you want (lol, im telling you girls love sweet revenge)
I dont know about the game you play but after I played mine, they're not worth to catch in the net..they get older, poorer and fatter..and he should be glad of the friendship because we dont bitch on our friends +)

Yes! Yes! No! No!

Yes I like boys who were delivered into the world circa 88-90s
Yes I like strange manly-girly guys
Yes I like Idols
Yes I like fanfics but not fiction books

Despite the antipathy from the soi-disant educated, high taste close ones, I find quality in them.
Addictive. Creative. Im happy! +)

No I dont like Twilight
No I dont like the overrated unoriginal Marie Digby
No I dont like girls that way
No I dont like driving

Yes I would love to kick Miley Cyrus!
No I dont want to date a guy with hairless armpits!

You Know

Remember I was excited about my plan going to Bangkok in November, Farid?
On the 29th , no today Im supposed to be on the plane leaving Malaysia behind to have fun.
Fun!
Bangkok is Fun!
29th, Rajamangala Stadium - Fun!!
But I ditched the plan for an unknown reason.
Now we know why and Im glad.
The airport is chaotic now eh?
And if I really bought the tix some more..Im gonna be doomed.
When unexplained things happened around you..just accept it.
It is called hikmah, believe it unbelievers!

So I heard it will be postponed to February 7 09
which is a day after my birthday!
Is it wise to be there ?
It could be the best birthday or the most horrible birthday ever

*sigh* you know we arent always lucky in life/death......

killed.

they said
"first love cant be forgotten"
I've been living with regrets
keep wondering of his whereabouts
friendster, myspace, emails are useless
I couldnt find him
I want to see again
just to check on someone who had secured his place

I found him after 7 years
my good memories are ruined
time, friends and stupidity have eaten him alive

old saying dies.
I say,
"first love must be forgotten"

Bali Wedding of My Bestie


...with Liya in B's room...while everybody dance to poco-poco

CDG one minute request (60x per day)

Asia FTW

"I've been dying just to feel you by my side, to know that you're mine"

Comme des Garçons,
drop by Isetan asap nehh?
i've been waiting for so long..


"I will sell my soul for something pure and true, someone like you"

P.S: I cant believe a fashion label reminds me of Garbage-#1 crush. Boy, I do have a huge crush on it.

co-amoxiclav reaction

I havent been updating lately not because Im sick of the blogging world.
Im just sick. literally.
sickness makes it hard for me to express myself.
lowbloodpressure.bronchitis.
only fatigue and pale face are obvious.
amazingly its the side effects of meds that are killing me.
If only they made me thin instead..and tone down one's eroticism.